Only Two Thing are Infinite
by RiYuYami
Summary: Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity. I happened to have experienced the latter with something that I thought was smart at the time. Stupidity is all that is now involved in my life especially since I’m a pregnant guy. mpreg
1. Chapter 1

Alright! My first Hetalia mpreg! And it happens to involve my two top favorite pairings! I came up with this idea out of boredom, during math class while I was doodling on my notes and was working on designs for characters for stuff and I worked on a drawing on a child named Roy, who is my OC child for Russia and America and then this idea came to me.

Summery: Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity. I happened to have experienced the latter with something that I thought was smart at the time. Stupidity is all that is now involved in my life especially since I'm a pregnant guy.

Warning: mpreg, mentions of a lemon, weird things, slight character bashing and a whole mess of other things. Also out of character situations, but that's normal in these stories so don't bloody point it out to me

This contains OCs, mostly for parents and all that nonsense.

I own only the plot and the OCs.

Pairings: Russia/ America, England/ America, France/ Canada, Germany/ Italy. There are others, but these are the top four

For this story, I have to use character names. This is an AU story and should be treated as such and nothing more my dear readers. Plus the story switches character POV; you'll figure it out once you get the hang of it.

America and Canada's parents are George Washington and his wife, if you guys know any other historical couples from other countries; please tell me so I can use those as parents.

On with the fic!

* * *

**Only Two Things are Infinite **

**Chapter One: I'm an idiot and nothing more**

* * *

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity.

I got this from an icon and I really believe it's true, especially right now, standing here in my private bathroom and looking at the two different white plastic sticks in each of my hands. Each one had a little blue plus on them and according to their packaging, they say positive.

Positive in the form of pregnancy, mind you.

Holy shit… I'm pregnant… Mom and Dad are going to murder me on the spot…

I guess I should explain, not only am I eighteen and in my final year of high school, but I'm also a male who is secretly gay and can somehow become pregnant it seems. I know what you're thinking; it's like something from the internet! My name is Alfred F. Jones and I'm a closet case gay living with Christian parents who are rich with my twin brother in a nice town in the States, where nothing weird happens.

Well, some weird things have happened before I guess, but I'm not sure if they are of great importance. Let's start with how everything came to be up until now with this whole situation I'm stuck in now.

I have a boyfriend named Ivan Braginski, a strange Russian who came here back while I was in the ninth grade with his two sisters. We became friends fast, though I normally have trouble making friends since I tend to act obnoxious from what my best friend Arthur says, but then again, he also thinks I'm an idiot, which seems to be true.

Ivan and I started to date back in the eleventh grade, but we were very careful not to show it around my parents since they are homophobes, or at least my dad is. Only a few people know I'm dating Ivan, Arthur and my brother Matthew and they are okay with it, though Arthur doesn't like me speaking about it for some reason. Then there are Feliciano and Ludwig who are nice to me, though me and Ludwig have had our fights, they found out about me and Ivan by accident… I don't really want to get into that…

Anyway, about two months ago my parents went on a trip for my dad's work, leaving me along with Matty. Ivan came over when Matty said he was going over to Francis' place for a bit. We watched a movie in my room and then Ivan showed me he brought some vodka, yeah, a Russian brought over some vodka.

Ten points if you can get where that lead too.

Alright, so when I came to the next morning, Ivan was sleeping next to me, I had a pounding head ache, we were both naked, and I wasn't a virgin anymore. I never told my parents but I told Mathew because he asked why I was washing my sheets even though I had changed them a few days before. Not surprising, he freaked out.

That was back in January and it's not March, that means I might be two months. Now, what caused me to believe I was pregnant? Well, a few days ago in health class the teacher was talking about pregnancies and someone asked how a woman knows.

The teacher pointed out morning sickness, mood swings, being tired and all that other jazz and I had all of those going on. So I went to the store today and got the pregnancy tests. I think Mathew's outside the door, I ran into him when I arrived home and we fell over, the contents of the bag I had showed him what I bought and he chased me upstairs.

"Matty, you out there?" I asked, and then heard a slight eep sound. So he was outside the door… stupid kid.

"Yes I am Alfred." He replied in that quiet voice he always had.

"Can you close and lock my door; I have something very important to tell you…" Luckily I have a bathroom in my room, it pays to be rich. I heard the door close and the sound of a lock turning, that's when I opened the door. I saw my twin brother looking at me, violet-eyes blinking as I handed him the sticks.

"Tell me what you see." I informed him and he gave me an odd look.

"Al, these are pregnancy sticks and they say… no way! You can't be..! That goes against all..! Mom and Dad are gonna..! Haven't you ever heard of a condom?!" He yelled at me, waving the things around.

"First of all, calm down, second, don't wave those around. And lastly, Ivan and I never expected something like this to happen, hell, I didn't even know I can get pregnant." I said in a calm tone, which didn't match the situation. I should be freaking out.

Apparently Mathew had the same train of thought. "You seem really calm about this whole thing, are you sure you're… knocked up?"

"Well, I did use four tests."

"How did you make that much pee for that…"

"There are some things in the universe that are confusing and this pregnancy is one of them." I sighed and walked over to my bed, lying down. I could feel Mathew looking at me. "If I am pregnant, what do I tell Mom and Dad, I can't keep it a secret because they would be wondering why my stomach is expanding… oh shit! I'm gonna be fat…! NO!" If there is one thing I hate in this world, it's me being fat…

I heard Mathew sigh and I'm sure he rolled his eyes. "Well you'll have to tell them soon before you start showing. And you'll have to tell Ivan as well."

My eyes widened and I sat up. I totally forgot about Ivan for a second there, how will he react? I've seen him angry and it was NOT a pretty sight, will he act the same about this? What will he do? Will he want me to get rid of it or will he leave me to take care of it on my own? Do I even want this child?

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked up at Mathew, seeing concern violet-eyes. "You okay?" He asked, his voice softer then normal.

A frown crossed my lips, my teeth biting into the bottom one. "I… don't know what to do… I want to keep the baby, it's mine and it deserves to live. I'm not going to be like those women who just kill the child in a horrible way, this baby has every right to live… but I don't know if Ivan or Mom and Dad will agree with me on this…"

"You won't know unless if you discuss it with them. And Alfred, I'm really confused by all of those since it seems to have come out of nowhere, but you will always have my full support, I don't want to see you unhappy since that's not a look that should ever be on your face."

I looked at him before pulling him down into a hug, God I'm happy to have a brother like Matty, he was always nice to me even if I got him in trouble. He hugged back and we pulled away.

"I'll tell Mom and Dad tonight, I'll tell Ivan when I get an ultrasound, in case he wants proof." I informed Mathew and he nodded. But I don't know if I'll live to get an ultrasound…

* * *

I watched Alfred at dinner; he was so tensed and freaked out, probably thinking of a good way to tell Mom and Dad the big news. Normally at dinner, he's always talking and saying stupid things, but tonight he wasn't talking. I'm surprised Mom and Dad didn't notice at all.

Dinner is now over and we are eating dessert, coffee ice cream, Alfred didn't want any and that's when Mom and Dad noticed him since he's usually shoving this stuff into his mouth as soon as he pulls the container from the freeze. We are now sitting at the table, Alfred asked for them to sit so he could tell them something.

"Guys, I have something I need to tell you, something really important…" He started.

"You better not have gotten into a fight again; you know you'll be grounded for a year for that." Dad stated bluntly, narrowing his blue-eyes.

"I didn't get into a fight Dad! It's something WAY different!"

"Well, get on with it." Mom insisted.

Alfred let out a sigh, biting his lip once more. "Okay… Dad, Mom… I'm… pregnant…" The room was very quiet except for Mom's spoon falling into her bowl, making a loud sound. Then Dad's eyes narrowed even more then before.

"What was that, did you just say you were _pregnant_?" He voice was coated in venom and I could see Alfred turn pale. "What the fuck is wrong with you, is this some kinda joke?!"

"It's true Dad, I'm not joking." Alfred said in a serious tone. I took notice that Mom's face was pale as well, a horrified look on her face along with something else, a look of guilt?

"You… you can't be… oh God… you slept with someone..?" She was shaking.

Alfred nodded. "I did… I slept with Ivan."

"That stupid Russian kid?! Why the hell did you even sleep with him?! Did he rape you?!" Dad exclaimed and I witnessed a flash of hurt and anger in Alfred's eyes.

"I slept with him because I love him! He didn't rape me!"

"Oh God…! My baby's gay and pregnant..!" Mom was freaking out, Dad and Alfred were yelling and I snuck away to my room. Once in there, I closed the door and went to my bed, hugging my stuff polar bear, a gift from Francis. I could hear the muffled yells of my brother and father and they didn't sound pretty as well. Soon it was just Dad yelling and I saw my door open, revealing and very angry but also depressed Alfred.

"What did he say?" I asked and he turned to me, looking like he didn't want to cry.

"He said to get an abortion and for me to break up with Ivan. He said he will disown me if I don't…" He was trembling and I motioned for him to sit on my bed. Once he did, he clung to me and I heard soft sobs. "I don't want to do those… I want to be with Ivan and I want my baby…" I heard him say and I just held him.

He slept in my room that night, not daring to leave until the next morning when my alarm went off.

TBC

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What do you think? This is new for me to write, I haven't really perfected myself in writing this style but I'll try my best. I'm sorry for the OOC parts, but this is how I write. I have no idea what Alfred's parents do for a living; you guys can give me suggestions.

Next chapter: Alfred tries to tell Ivan, how will he react? And what does Alfred's mother know that he doesn't?

Please review.


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry for the delay, I had a LOT of school work, especially for a project that will make or break me for graduation…

It would have been nice if someone told me I spelt Matthew's name incorrectly, though that is a form of spelling it.

Anyway, thanks for the reviews, lovely to hear from some people who have come across this story. I should state that this chapter was pre-written in a note book and it actually went into a different direction then intended since I didn't want Ivan finding out about the baby so soon. Need to make Alfred's worried thoughts stretch out a bit.

Now, I should say this, I have a lot of ideas for this story and before anyone says 'oh, Ivan's gonna reject the kid and then Arthur's gonna come in and help Alfred' you're only half right. Arthur will come in to help Alfred, but Ivan won't reject the kid, I have an idea for him but it won't come up until later in the story.

Gilbert is mentioned in this chapter, he has a huge part in this story but it depends on how things play out in the end with Alfred giving birth, I want Gilbert to help since I've made him a doctor (I love sexy white-haired men as doctors).

On with the fic!

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**Only Two Things are Infinite **

**Chapter Two: Hello There, I See You**

* * *

I spent the night in Matty's room, too angry to go to my own in case I spotted Dad. I did, however, leave in a mad dash to my room at four thirty to lose whatever was in my stomach. I'm surprised Matthew didn't wake up when I jumped out of bed. It wasn't until an hour later that I was finished with this horrible morning ritual.

Uhh… I feel gross, I'm getting a shower. Striping off my clothing from yesterday, didn't leave to change remember, I stepped into the shower, turning on the water and soon feeling the delightful spray of warm water on my tired body. I started to clean myself but when my hand brushed my stomach, I blushed. It's weird, knowing that there was now a child growing inside of me that was also… making my skin a bit sensitive, I guess.

Once I was finished, I did my normal morning activities to look good for school. After leaving my bathroom, I don't used anyone else's in the house, I wore slightly baggy clothing, my hips are a tiny bit wider then they were a few months ago and my mind is seriously making me self conscious right now about my stomach. When I went downstairs, I found that Mom and Dad had already left for work, having left earlier then normal today. Mom didn't even make breakfast for us.

I guess this is because of last night; they don't want to see the little blotch on their perfect sheets that is their life.

With a sigh, I made myself some toast and a glass of milk, not really hungry for anything heavy right now and I've been wanting some milk since I woke up. As I ate, I watched Matthew walk into the dining room, looking a bit confused. "Where are Mom and Dad?"

"They left early, I guess, probably didn't want to face the black sheep of the family they call a son." I took a sip of milk; it tasted sour when those words left my lips.

Matthew frowned and went to get some cereal, that weird Eggo waffles maple syrup flavored stuff that he loved so much. "You are not a black sheep Al. They just don't know how to deal with this. You're a pregnant, closet-case gay male teen. You're practically a two-hour special on 20/20!"

I glared at him for his stupid joke. "Shut up Matthew. But I guess you're right, I'd probably react the same way to if I was in their shoes."

"Still planning on keeping it?"

"Yeah, I'm still going to. I just need to go and see a doctor about this, probably on Saturday since I have work today and tomorrow." In case you're wondering, I work at a tea shop that's European styled and owned by my Chinese friend Yao, seeing as they enjoy the style very much and I can't blame them. Arthur also works there, he loves tea, must be because he's British.

"Alright, I'll see if I can get you an appointment, or we can ask Gilbert to help since he works there, but then again you might not want him to know yet." I nodded at this, Gilbert is Ludwig's older brother who is NOTHING like his little brother, except that they are both German and are related. Somehow he was smart enough to get into med school, though he spends most of his time on the computer.

Standing up, I placed my dishes in the sink and left them. "Alrighty Matty, let's go. Arthur will be here any minute." I can't drive and neither can Matty until we get our own cars so Arthur has to drive us to school. Matthew finished breakfast and put his dishes in the dishwasher before we left the house, with me locking the door. We didn't wait long before we saw the silver car Arthur owned.

I waved at the green-eyed Briton and walked up to him. "Morning Iggy!" I smiled and he gave me an annoyed glare.

"Why do you insist on calling me that, you git? Now get in the car, I have don't want to be late for school again." Arthur stated as we got in. I looked over at Arthur as I got in the passenger seat, do I have to tell him as well? He is my best friend after all, maybe I should wait though. I'll have to tell him soon though, since he can always tell when something is up with me. He knows me like the back of his hand.

* * *

I don't feel right, seeing Ivan right now since I still have to tell him, but I don't want another incident like last night. All day I've been avoiding him, having to hide or to pretend I'm doing something.

It's almost time for the final bell and everyone is talking while the teacher ignores us, as usual. I was busy, doodling on a worksheet when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Turning, I looked into pale violet-eyes, belonging to only one person I know. "I-Ivan."

Ivan gave me a slight frown. "How come you've been avoiding me Alfred, I'm a bit hurt by the neglect." He said, voice deep and attractive as normal.

I frowned at what he said and I blushed lightly, my hand secretly going to my stomach. "I'm sorry Ivan for ignoring you, but… I'm a bit sick and I don't want you getting what I have too!" I lied on the spot. "I don't want you missing school or being too sick to spend time with me!"

He blinked before giving me a smile, an honest one that made him look like a cute, little kid. I know, I'm surprised I even thought that but it's true. I'm just glade that he bought that stupid lie though, I'm still sticking to telling him after I get proof that I'm pregnant. But if this is false, then I'll have nothing to fear, except Mom and Dad not accepting me for being a homosexual.

Oh that's gonna make everything better… **NOT**.

The bell rang and I rushed out of the classroom and to my locker, I had to get out of here because… I have to use the bathroom, you know how it works with pregnant chicks, gotta water the porcelain valley and whatnot. Okay, that sounded gross but you know what I mean! Anyway, I just wanted to get home since I hate the school bathroom's, all nasty and covered in gross things and I've seen one too many cockroaches in there for one lifetime thank you very much.

Spotting Arthur, before almost crashing into a wall, I rushed over to him. "Please drive fast today, I have to go." I said bluntly.

"Go where?" When he didn't get an answer from me that jerk started to laugh. "Alright, I'll try." No you won't. "How come you never just use them here?" He said as we left the building, Matty wasn't coming with us since he was going to hang out with Francis today.

"Because they are so gross and I think they are crawling with STDs, among other things…" Are we really have this conversation? Wow, the things people talk about nowadays… "Plus guys smoke in there and it's bad for a hero's health and for the baby's he-!" I shut my trap and Arthur raised an eyebrow. I thought this kinda thing only happened in stories and shitty chick flicks!

"What did you say? Were you going to say… baby?" Arthur asked, looking so confused and right at me, I swear to God or whoever is up there that I can hear is brain breaking just trying to figure this out.

"Umm… surprise? I'm pregnant?"

3

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2

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1

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"What the FUCK?!" Arthur walked right up to me and got all up in my personal space. "How can- what the- is this a joke?!"

"It's not a joke; this is something I would not make a crack about. I really am pregnant, knocked up, with child, bun in the oven and all that other bullshit." I even lifted up my shirt, but I wasn't showing yet so why the hell did I do that? Arthur looked at me and I have him a serious face. "I know it's confusing, hell, I found out last night but before you dare say it, no, I am NOT getting an abortion. The little guy or girl is staying right here."

"I never said anything about you getting rid of it. I'm just curious as to why? How can you, a male, get pregnant?"

"That's what I'd like to know, I'm planning on getting one of those ultrasound things done to seem but can you drive me to the hospital? My mom and dad are avoiding me at all cost right now."

"You told them?" Arthur blinked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, last night I told them I was both gay AND pregnant. Dad was threatening to disown me unless if I broke up with Ivan and killed the kid." I frowned deeply.

Arthur gave me a sympathetic look and placed a hand on my shoulder. "You should do what you think it right. And I'll support you, since you're a bloody git who needs all the help he can get in this stupid world."

I looked at Arthur before I hugged him tightly, ignoring his demands for me to let him go.

* * *

It's Saturday and I'm driving to the hospital with a queasy best friend/ crush (don't judge me for liking an already taken person, it happens all the time) and his twin brother. When I arrived to pick Alfred up, his father was yelling at him and Matthew was pushing his arguing brother out the door. I only heard a slight bit of the conversation, if you could call it that, but I'm guessing that Mr. Jones found out where Alfred was going and he got pissed.

"Al," I heard Matthew say from the back, "you okay?"

"I got riled up and it's making my morning sickness worse… please don't hit any speed bumps or I'll hurl…"

"I'd rather you not do that Alfred." I gave him a look, which allowed me a brief look-over. I took notice to Alfred's face; it was pale and had that sick look to it, poor guy. I also noticed that he had one hand on his stomach, rubbing it a bit, I almost wanted to touch it but I didn't. Alfred is with Ivan and is carrying his child, I'm jealous though. I've had feelings for the guy since sixth grade but I never told him. I'm a bloody coward.

Part of me wishes for Ivan to break up with Alfred, but I know it's cruel to think like that. Alfred's happiness is my happiness, I've always told myself this, and I'll do whatever I can to support him. I soon came to a stop at the hospital and got out, helping Alfred out.

"Thanks Iggy, but you didn't have to." He gave me a lopsided grin and I shook my head.

"It's simply a good deed Alfred."

Getting Alfred signed in at the Pediatrics was very… odd. The woman at the front desk kept looking a us funny because we said he had an appointment with someone named Dr. Kurcka. I almost hit the woman before Matthew dragged me to a seat. As we waited, I watched Alfred who was in a dazed state, watching some of the children playing in the waiting room, his hand rubbing small circles on his stomach.

"Mr. Jones? Hey Alfred!" All three of us looked over at the door that lead to the offices in the back to see someone we all knew very well.

"Hi Gil." Alfred grinned and walked over to him, Matthew and me trailing behind.

"Didn't expect to see you here, what's up?" The albino asked as he had us step into an examination room for Alfred to have his vitals checked. (1)

"I have an appointment with someone named Dr. Kurcka." Alfred responded.

"Dr. Kurcka? But she works with pregnant…" He stopped and an all knowing smirk formed on his face. "I see, well, good luck with that Al." He continued to smirk as he checked Alfred's pulse.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Cause you're pregnant, now wake your shoes off and get on the scale." How could that German bastard be so casual about this?! It was as if he was enjoying a nice cup of tea in the garden!

Matthew blinked and raised an eyebrow. "How did you-?!"

"It's not that hard to tell, plus I know someone who is in the same boat as Al." Gilbert replied, checking Alfred's height and weight before typing it up on his computer, letting the subject die right there. "Okay, you're done. Go down the hall to room C24 and go in, that's her office."

WE gave him out thanks before we headed to where Gilbert told us to go. Opening the door, we saw a strange chair in the center of the room that was next to a machine with a screen on it. There was also a woman sitting at a desk. "Hello, can I help you?" She said, turning to us.

"Hi, I'm Alfred F. Jones, I have an appointment." Dr. Kurcka, this was her from what her name plate said, blinked at him.

"Oh yes, you've come here for an ultrasound. Please have a seat and lie down." He motioned to the odd chair and Alfred did as he was told.

"You seem calm; a guy walks in for an ultrasound doesn't surprise you?" I asked, crossing my arms. Though that was a rather stupid question, ultrasounds are not just for looking at babies, they are also used for finding problems with organs in the body but Alfred is as healthy as a bloody horse, no need to find any problems in him, well, except his brain might need to be examined.

"In this line of work, not a lot surprises you hun." Dr. Kurcka replied as she pulled up Alfred's shirt before poking his stomach.

"Hey! What are you doing?!" He exclaimed, face turning red.

"Just testing to see where it is." She stopped and turned to the machine, I'm guessing this the ultrasound machine. Turning back to Alfred, the woman spread a strange gel on his stomach. After that, she placed some strange device on his stomach and moved it about until was saw something appear on the screen. A strange mobbing object was seen and I was Alfred's eyes widen. "Mr. Jones, this is your baby."

A small smile crossed Alfred's lips and he raised his hand, waving it. "Hello… I can see you." He said to the image, making my heart skip a beat, this was such an exciting even but that small ping in my chest came up, making me wish that baby was mine.

* * *

When I arrived home, I found Mom in the living room, reading one of her Daniel Steel novels. "Hey Mom." I spoke softly; I could hear Matty go upstairs as Mom turned to me.

"Did... did you see it?" She asked, still nervous around me as if I was going to snap and attack her like a rabid dog.

"Yeah and I got a few pictures. Doc says it's about two and a half months old and the size of a nut or something." I pulled the pictures from the envelope I was given and I handed them to her. Carefully, Mom looked at the images before she started to cry.

"This is my entire fault…" He words were sad, soaked in guilt and it caught me off guard.

"Wha?"

"I knew you could get pregnant."

I stared at her. "How… why didn't you tell me?" My voice was quiet, but filled with rising anger.

"Because I never expected you to be gay! When you were in the womb with Matthew, you were actually developing as a girl but when I was seven months along; your gender became that of a male. After you two were born, the doctors did some tests and found estrogen in you along with testosterone. They found male and female parts in you as well. I kept this from everyone…"

I just looked at her before taking the pictures from her. "Thanks _Mom_." the title of being my mother tasted like vinegar to me when I said it. I turned and stormed off to my room, tears going down my face.

I'm a freak, I was born incorrect. I'm neither a boy nor a girl… what am I?

TBC

* * *

Was I too harsh to poor Alfred at that last part? Having him say that?

Nah!

Next chapter: Rejection followed by acceptance. Along with an awkward moment in health class for Alfred…

(1) Vital checks is a rather poor excuse for vital regions. XD

Please review!


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